Honorez Vos Défis!

“A man either lives life as it happens to him, meets it head-on and licks it, or he turns his back on it and starts to wither away.”
― Gene Roddenberry

During a recent radio interview the host opened the interview by asking me a very interesting question: “Between the ages of three and thirteen tell me about an event that changed your life?”  Instantly, without much thought to it I said: “ The day my father was murdered.”

My father’s death was probably the first challenge that I had to face. But I did not know about the set up until I was in my late 20’s and developed this odd sensing that there was “a hole in my soul”.  Something was missing but I could not clearly identify what it was.

One day back then as I was browsing through the book store, I happened to come across a book by Elyce Wakerman called Father Loss. I was not even thinking about this topic at all, the word “father loss” had never entered my mind.

But there was this book, sitting on the shelf calling out to me. Well, I took the book home, read it in one night. When I was finished, I threw the book across the room and cried for 5 years. I did not know until then the how the loss of my father at an early age had affected my life. I never had a chance to mourn him. Having no conscious memory of the first man to hold me to his heart one day and disappearing the next, left a huge hole in my life that I was totally unaware of. But once I understood all the affects it had on me, I was able to doggedly work through what issues this situation had presented to my life. Imagine understanding why my mother had over-compensated for my father’s death by giving my brother more attention. I had always felt as if she cared more about him than she did for me. I resented this treatment for years. But once I understood the dynamics of my family, I was able to FORGIVE her and build a strong relationship with her. This is just one of the many positive take-aways from this experience.

Now after the radio show, I started thinking about all the other challenges I have been presented with in my life. I am wondering: are these random or are they intentionally set up for the necessary growth that I need to expand into who I really am? So I started to look back at everything I have experienced and I can’t say for sure, but I did realize one key thing. If you do not face and overcome these challenges you will stay stuck, not grow and miss out on the wonderful manifestations life has to offer.

I know so many people who when met with a challenging situation, get frustrated and give up. Or sometimes facing the intense pain of a situation deters people from pushing all the way through to a needed healing. The problem is that whatever core issue exists that needs to be addressed, it will keep presenting itself until we look it straight in the eye and grab it by the horns.

I have seen situations and people constantly resurface in my life and I have come to understand that this is something or someone that needs to be addressed so that I…yours truly, Friendly Neighborhood Cheeky Spirit, can grow! Looking back at all these experiences even though they were trying times in my life, I now see them as awesome set points! As I overcame each obstacle I understood more about myself and only became a stronger, better person.

And so I give honor and gratitude as gifts to those who were part of the whole experience. When I realized that where I am today, in this awesome place in my life, is because every situation that challenged me, every time someone threw me to the wolves, every single tear I cried in heartache, led me right here, talking about it.

Honor the challenges you have overcome, don’t look at them with disdain. See them for what they truly are and celebrate them as they are only kneading out your Spirit.

Viva Divine!

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