Setting The Record Straight- For The Last Time!
I am truly inspired by Sue Monk Kidd. She is the author of The Secret Life Of Bees. I loved that book and the movie, so when I heard she was going to be a guest on Super Soul Sunday on OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network) I was pleasantly elated. I looked forward to watching it.
She is somewhat a diminutive woman, soft spoken and glaringly honest, open and available. I thoroughly enjoyed her story of how she ended up where she was. The thing that struck me was that on her thirtieth birthday, she woke up and announced to her family that she was going to be a writer. I found this statement on the Oprah.com website that really encapsulates what was going through her mind:
"She (Sue) grew up in a time when women were pressured to follow a traditional path, and in many ways she did: marrying, becoming a nurse, having two children. But she was also acutely aware of the women's movement and the struggle for civil rights, which not only helped shape her inner voice but at some point started telling her that writing was what she was born to do. At age 30, Kidd sat her husband down and announced her intention: to become a writer. To achieve that goal, she tapped "a reservoir inside myself—my own little ordinary genius that is the source of creative life. I think we all have one."
I believe we all have that reservoir inside of us, something that moves in a direction where we feel right at home. Some of us start finding our way later in life. I know in my case, once it clicked in my head what it was that I was supposed to do, I realized I needed to give it one hundred percent. I had been playing on and off with writing for a while. But then one day I looked at all the journals I have kept over the years and realized that writing and sharing stories, especially positive stories is really what makes my heart sing. I am moved by the positive energy of the world, and I am acutely AWARE of when it was missing in my life and those of others. I love infusing a positive energy. This is what inspires me.
For years my friends knew about this bent of mine, those close to me knew I had a blog and that I had kept journals for years. People have been on me to write a book for the longest, because THEY think I have a story to tell. Will I do that, I don’t know. But I have come to realize that those outside the inner circle really don’t know any of this. I have been posting on social networks for a while and have progressively been speaking a certain language over the years. But what has happened within the last few months has been a full blown awakening, resulting in an unquenchable, compelling fire to follow my path. I had been holding back a lot of the story, but eventually what is building up inside will come bursting out.
So to those who really don’t know me, I’ve always been like this, I have just been silent, or I was silenced. I am finally breaking past those walls. Through loving encouragement and people believing in me I am taking a chance. This is not overnight event, nor is this an attempt to become “someone”. All I am doing is following the path that I can now clearly see. I see myself in the last row of a huge choir, with a tiny voice.
This is why I referenced Sue Monk Kidd. One day you’re just going along in life, and then one day you wake up and say: Dammit. I need to do this. I had to make myself very clear to someone that I am not doing any of this for “therapeutic” reasons, I have already been to therapy! But I sense that sometimes people feel that regular folks don’t have a story or a voice, that we should stay in our lane and that only celebrities are the ones that we can give reference to. I think that needs to change! I am here to tell you, regular people have stories I hear them every day, and if you start to pay attention, a lot of us are deciding to talk. We have decided to do this because we have been though something and want to share this, in the hopes that maybe it may help another person to share their experience. That’s how Sue Monk Kidd and folks like her got started. She listened to her inner voice and followed through.
I am just listening to my inner voice and following through…where the path goes, hell if I know! Just a little voice in a big choir.